Billosophy

5 Things Kids Want To Hear

// July 25th, 2010 // 1 Comment » // Belief, Life, Thoughts

I was thinking about this the other day and decided to try to come up with a few things I do to push my son Tyler and challenge him to think and try harder.  I looked at this not from my point of view as the parent – but as Tyler and what would I want from me in order to really push hard and reach my goals … here are my thoughts on 5 things every kid wants to hear from their parents

1. No … Because – Nobody wants to be told “No” … especially when there is nothing backing up the decision.  How many times did you hear the phrase “No, because I said so!”  Then we as kids, would just walk away shaking our head thinking “well that didn’t make any sense at all” … but as kids, our attention span was the equivalent of a puppy so we quickly moved on.  The inquisitive nature of kids will always test and push your boundaries on what is and is not acceptable behavior, activities, language, mannerism.  It is our job as parents to provide the boundaries for the kids and then teach them how to use the boundaries to get the most out of life.  When they push the boundaries to far, it is up to us to correct and teach.  If the answer is “No” … explain why.  How else are they going to learn where the danger zones are?  “No, because if you touch the hot stove you will burn your hand” for example.

2. I need you to {insert goal here} – Kids need to be pushed … they need to be challenged.  If you do not start challenging early it is only making your job as a parent harder.  Last year Tyler moved down to live with Dawn and I.  It was a HUGE decision for him to make and he really put some thought into why he was moving away from his mom and brother and starting a new life with Dawn and I in a strange town.  Tyler has struggled in school always … I was very clear in what my expectations were regarding his school work and grades.  I set the bar very high for Tyler early .. A’s and B’s only on his semester and end of year report card.  Every day we talked about the progress, we had a countdown calendar for the semester and end of year.  I heard EVERY excuse in the book (my favorite was “The teacher gave us the wrong test … I studied chapter 3 and the test was on chapter 4!)  However, at the end of the first semester Tyler made Honor Roll (4 A’s and 3 B’s) and at the end of the year he finished with 3 A’s and 4 B’s … There are no words that can explain the pride Tyler felt and showed on the last day of school when he found out he actually DID IT!  Trust me – the 9 month journey was frustrating and hard … but I think that made the victory even sweeter for Tyler.  Kids want challenge … they need challenge … it is up to us as parents to set the bar and support them 100% in their pursuit.  This does not mean we should DO it for them … let them fail along the way … after all – how else will they learn?

3. You can do it!!! – Who does not LOVE a cheerleader in their corner?  This one is pretty self explanatory … support your kids while they are working to reach the goals you have set for them.  How hard do you work and how proud are you when you reach a goal and get nothing from those around you?  Kids look up to their parents … they strive to please their parents.  I pushed Tyler last year hard … at the same time, I told him every day “You can do this!”  Even when he gave me 186 excuses why his Chemistry teacher was not doing a good job … my response was “It is not his job to get the grades … it is his job to make sure you are in class and receive the material he is going to test you on.”  I knew Tyler was able to do it … and I pushed him to accept nothing less than a B and he DID IT.  So … I guess that would mean “I WAS RIGHT!”  When you set goals for your kids … cheer for them along the way … Its FUN!

4. I am proud of you – No matter what the outcome … be proud of your kids.  Try it sometime … out of the blue, when your kid does something … just say “I am proud of you!”  They might pretend to not care, but I promise they will remember that statement for a long time.  There were times when Tyler wanted to give up during the year … I supported him and kept him focused on the goal.  I gave him help, hired a tutor, emailed his teachers … I was involved.  I told him he could do it … and I believed that he could.  He struggled and accomplished the goal.  The icing on the cake was when Dawn and I looked Tyler in the eye and told him “We are so proud of you!”  He smiled … he pretended it didn’t matter … but his actions told a different story.  He walked prouder, he felt prouder … and I over heard him on the phone a few times telling his mom, brother, grandma and grandpa – “I did it!”  I am proud of Tyler … and in 4 weeks we start all over again.  I am soooooo ready!

5. I love you – Kids do everything they can to please their parents.  They look for acceptance from their parents and they are hungry to learn how their mom and dad feel about them.  Every day I tell Tyler I love him … and every time I talk to Bryan I tell him too.  Believe it or not – Kids care about what their parents think about them.  If you have not told your son or daughter you love them lately … START NOW!  For one reason – so they can never say “I dont know if my parents loved me” … and that statement usually comes out during a therapy session or an interview from a jail cell.  Kids want to know … kids beg for attention … give it to them – and watch what happens.

I am sure there are other things kids want to hear … leave a comment and tell me what you tell your kids and how you challenge them.

An Endless Renewable Resource

// July 18th, 2010 // 5 Comments » // Belief, Thoughts

We all know someone who has ended a relationship, lost a loved one, or has been emotionally hurt by someone in their life.  This has been on my mind lately because a dear friend of mine just ended a marriage and is in the process of rebuilding her life.  I look back at my own journey when my marriage ended 10 years ago – what I went through, the highs and lows … the lessons I learned.  It took me 10 years to figure this out … but the latest discovery I have had in my own life and what I am helping my friend realize is that Love is a renewable resource.

How many times have you hear someone (or yourself) say “I don’t think I can ever love again!”  How many people in your life have shut down and refuse to open up and allow someone new in?  If we take a step back and think about it … why would you refuse yourself the feeling of loving another?  It is not like you can stop yourself from loving … how many things do you love?  A Dog, Cat, Mom, Dad, Siblings, Car, Book, Movie, Best Friend … no matter how hard you try … you cant “stop” loving.

So what does this accomplish – the act of protecting yourself from loving or being loved.  Sounds more like an oxymoron to me – how can you protect yourself from something that makes your life better/happier/healthier?  When I hear “I will never love again” … what I hear are people who stick their head in the sand and withdraw into their own world thinking they are protecting themselves.  But lets think about it this way … when a turtle pulls everything into its shell to protect itself from threat – how far can it go?

Protecting yourself is smart – it is necessary in order to be successful in life, but be smart with action.  Decisions you make, behaviors you allow, boundaries you set – these are all protective measures you take for yourself.  They help you maximize life by allowing you the freedom to focus on productive actions to build successful relationships.

I ran across a blog by Tracy Todd this past week … her post Heart Running Free was a great read and this quote helped me realize things in my own life:

With every emotion life has to offer – with every disappointment, heartbreak, tragedy, uncertainty, happiness, joy, dream, hope, and love (lost and found) – I learn a little more about myself.  I find strength within me that I never knew existed before.  Life’s experiences change and mold me.  But, more importantly, they define who I am.

What are your boundaries … what are the behaviors that matter most to you?  Tell us about your relationship successes and lessons learned.

Its Just A Word!

// February 19th, 2010 // 2 Comments » // Belief, News

Have you heard about “Spread the word, to end the word” campaign? You might have if you were reading headlines a couple weeks ago. If you don’t know, the short version is – the White House chief of staff, Rahm Emanuel, used “The Word” in a meeting …what word – “RETARDED!”  I have had this discussion with other friends of mine also regarding this word.  I could understand if Mr Emanuel was pointing at a mentally challenged person while saying the word “Retarded” … and how that might be construed as “insensitive” but when using the word to describe a situation or action … aren’t we just taking it a bit to far?

The definition of Retard is “to make slow; delay the development or progress of (an action, process, etc.); hinder or impede.”  Is the statement “Refrigeration can be used to retard the growth of the bacterial culture” defensive … or discriminatory?  Why then, if someone says “That is Retarded,” am I suppose to instantly think about special needs kids?  I don’t get it … and what kills me is the people who are coming under attack for using this word, are using it in a manner that does not point towards mentally disabled people … however, you show me a human that would use the word Retarded as a derogatory statement towards a group of other humans … and I will show you someone who really does NOT care what you or the rest of society thinks about the language they chose to use.  The only thing we are doing as a society is putting the “sensitive” and respectable people on edge and getting them to self censor themselves when they speak – and most of the time the underlying message gets lost in the “Political Correctness.”

Where does it end?  What is acceptable now?  What words do we use today in every day conversation that will be derogatory in 5, 10, 15 years … Fat?  Skinny?  Blonde?  Lazy?

When we stop trying to manage others actions, we free up a lot of time to invest into our own life … we can then become the example for people to follow.  Be the change in society … do not armchair quarterback what is happening around you.

Ohhhh The Hypocrisy!

// February 12th, 2010 // 2 Comments » // Belief

Man – I have fallen behind in my writing lately.  6 weeks into the new year too … UGH!  OK, I am going to need each one of you who read this to keep me writing.  If I have not posted anything after 2 or 3 days – email me and let me know how disappointed you are!  K – Thanks!  I have not written in 10 days … I have a lot to say … so, enjoy this post and PLEASE, leave a comment – I think this is going to stir up some feelings!  *grin*

I read an article the other day titled “Stop Teaching Our Kids To Kill” by David Marsh.  This article talks about Lt. Col. Dave Grossman and how he has “laid siege to the entertainment industry” through his theory of Killology.  Grossman’s theory is that “violence in TV, movies and video games is teaching our kids to kill.”  Ummmm – WHAT???  My first reaction was dismissal – “Oh No, here is another crazy ass giving parents another excuse why NOT to raise their own kids!”  Then after about .0034 seconds … I realized one thing – This guy, Lt. Col. Dave Grossman, is a 24 year veteran with the US Military!  He is not some whacked out nut case (my assumption, since most Lt. Col.’s need to be pretty with it if they are going to make it 24 years) … anyway … Here is a man who has made a career from an industry of killing.  Does that make him an expert on what the Entertainment industry is doing?  NOPE … does it make him an expert on the psychology of kids and what makes them do things?  NOPE (for the record – that person does not exists – you can not tell me why kids do things – its impossible!)

So – what is Grossman’s stand?  He wants to “stop an industry that’s selling death and horror and destruction to children as entertainment.”  Now – I would like YOU (the reader) to take a minute and think about that statement.  What is the first word or name that comes to mind when you think about “an industry that is selling death and horror and destruction.”  The first “industry” I think about when the topic of death and destruction is discussed is MEDIA.  Our NEWS in America is no longer about News … it is over-sensationalized garbage where explosions and affairs take top billing over issues that can actually ruin our society.  I am taken back to a time when Anna Nicole Smith was found dead in South Florida … CNN and FOX and MSNBC aired this information for 9 straight days!  Michael Jackson’s death … 3 weeks … NOT NEWS!

The war in Iraq (support it or not) and the coverage we are showing on the 57 NEWS channels that air NEWS 24 hours a day / 7 days a week … wouldn’t you say that might be a cause for the desensitization of our kids to death and gore?  Not Lt. Col. Grossman … he wants you to believe that playing Call Of Duty – Modern Warfare 2 is going to “teach youngsters the skill of killing.”  So – if I understand Grossman correctly – do away with the video games, movies, radio and TV industry and all our problems will be solved!  HA HA HA … I disagree … Circle Gets The Square!

I have a very good friend in the video game industry, he has worked for over 10 years and is currently lead designer at a successful gaming company – I sent him the link to this article and this was his response:

Ultimately, all of the studies have not proven this to be the case. We, as a culture, aren’t any more violent than we used to be (I’m looking at you Coliseum)….we’re simply more desperate, more selfish and better connected so the flow of information happens much faster, creating the illusion. We are definitely more desensitized, but we’re desensitized to everything. Stand in the aisle at a Walmart and you’ll see children shouldered up to magazines telling women how to satisfy their men better.  Covers with mostly naked women all over them. You’ve got thongs in child sizes, children brands like “apple bottom” which refers to the shape of a woman’s ass. Violence isn’t really the biggest threat to our existence, it’s always going to be a part of it, it’s actually the sexualization of children, and especially girls.

You want to know what’s going to destroy the world?  Unwanted children and the death of class and self-respect.  Not to mention the fact that it’s impossible for the world to manage the flow of entertainment to children. Entertainment is built for a specific audience and rated as such. It’s up to parents to be the filter between their kids and the music, movies, games, books and pictures of the world. It doesn’t matter what kind of regulations we impose, without that filter it’s all for nothing … and the filter is what is gone because so many people are having children that have no business doing so. I’m not worried about my kids playing Halo, though I wouldn’t let anyone under 12 play it, I’m worried about what they see every day in the culture around them.

You want to save the world? Don’t regulate entertainment or media, regulate breeding.

What drives me absolutely NUTS is when I read about government, leaders, groups, pastors, anyone – try to tell ME how to raise MY CHILD!  Tyler and Bryan are both amazing kids … Smart, Witty, Successful and Polite – they play video games, they watch movies (sometimes movies I wont even watch – *SHOCK*), they read magazines … yet, somehow they do not fit into the mold these idiots are trying to stuff them into.  Their argument does NOT hold water … because when you boil it down – it is still the parents responsibility to raise the kids!  All these guys want to do is point blame away from adults who have unruly kids, adults who need a reason to blame for their own failures.  Grossman points out in his presentation “young shooters in school massacres in Colorado and Kentucky, among others, were avid video game players.”  WAIT … I am an “avid” video game player … I play my Xbox AT LEAST 3 – 4 times a week … and have been known to play “shooter games” 4 – 6 hours at a time … does that mean I am going to go crazy and start killing?  How about looking at other “factors” with the school shooters … loners, picked on, rebellious, small group of friends, absent parents – I wouldn’t even put Video Games in the top 20 reasons these kids did what they did … blaming video games for violence is easy … but does that make it right?  It’s like saying “Guns Kill People” … noooooo, its the little tiny bullets that kill people … the gun is just a tool … like a hammer, or saw … both of those tools kill people too if used for that purpose – are we now going to raise up against Hammers and Saws???

OK – lets look at this from another angle … and the reason why my post is titled “Ohhhh the Hypocrisy!”  Lt. Col Grossman wants us to believe video games and the entertainment industry is BAD … if this is true – then why does the US Military make it look sooooo exciting in their ad campaigns?  Forgive me – but doesn’t this commercial make being in the Military look and feel like playing a real life video game – only thing they leave out is you get ONE CHANCE – there is no spawn point on these maps:

How can a man with 24 years of Military service stand up and say how horrible an industry is when the same Military uses that industry to attract recruits?  After all … wouldn’t the Military want to attract someone other than an unstable, video gamer that could snap and kill people anytime?  Desensitization happens everywhere – its not one industry/person/company’s fault.  If you try to point the finger at one and ignore other factors affecting the end result you end up being foolish and self-sabotage your mission.

What do you think – when you read this post (and the article on Lt Col Grossman) what is your experience?  What goes through your mind when you think about “desensitizing our youth” … I look forward to any comments you all leave!

The Art Of Forgiveness

// February 2nd, 2010 // 9 Comments » // Belief

Within my social network I have recently read about a few people having to deal with forgiveness … the ability to forgive and if someone is “worthy” of forgiveness. It all started when I read a blog post about the pain of re-living past events … it was hard to read and I am sure, even harder to post! I commented on this “friends” (used loosely as “one who writes a blog I read” kinda way) post regarding my thoughts on forgiveness and I was surprised to read the comments from other readers. They ranged from “I am sorry” to “Screw the bastard” … I began to realize many people do not understand what forgiveness is, how to forgive and what is the next step after forgiving.

Forgiveness has roots in many religions – Buddhism talks about it as a practice to prevent harmful thoughts from causing havoc on one’s mental well-being. Christianity is largely based on forgiveness and Jesus often speaks to Christians about forgiving or showing mercy towards others. Asking for forgiveness is very much a part of the practice of Hinduism. Islam teaches that God (Allah) is ‘the most forgiving’, and is the original source of all forgiveness, along with that the Qur’an makes it clear that, whenever possible, it is better to forgive another than to attack another and in Judaism if a person causes harm, but then sincerely and honestly apologizes to the wronged individual and tries to rectify the wrong, the wronged individual is religiously required to grant forgiveness … religiously required, Seriously!?!?

Back in 1988 the Gallup Organization took a “large representative sampling of American people” on various religious topics and found that 94% said it was “Important to forgive” however, 85% said they needed “Outside help to be able to forgive.” Nobody understands … Forgiveness is NOT for the recipient … it is “FOR” the “GIVER” … the person who is able to forgive those who have wronged them – is no longer wronged. Do not read that as “I’ll let you do whatever you want to me and it’s OK” – but more like “Understand there are consequences for your actions, however, YOUR actions do not control me!”

Henri Nouwen said:

“When we become aware that we do not have to escape our pains, but that we can mobilize them into a common search for life, those very pains are transformed from expressions of despair into signs of hope”

This is a great quote … a “common search for life” is a perfect phrase because it’s what we are all doing on Earth. Living, learning, searching … when we understand that our pains are experiences that shape us into who we are and we can actually live in the pain and survive, we become empowered! For me, when I forgive someone, I am able to feel the pain – learn the lesson (trust me, there is one!) – So I can live my life as an example to others. My forgiveness is not for the person who acted against me. Honestly, I do not care how that person “feels” or if they are able to live with themselves. My act of forgiveness is my ability to let go of the action, understand that I do not control anyone other than myself. Learn the lesson by seeing the warning signs and not allow the same thing to happen over and over.

Being able to forgive takes practice, it is an art in ways. Forgiveness takes focus, determination, drive, passion and vision … forgiving is not something that “comes easy” … forgiveness HURTS … forgiving sucks most of the time. Just like any transition in life, changing one’s self is uncomfortable – however, the end result is so sweet.

What is your struggle with forgiveness? What do you find yourself agonizing over – when faced with having to practice forgiving those who do you wrong?

It Is All About Perspective

// January 28th, 2010 // 5 Comments » // Belief, Thoughts

I read, mostly to learn, sometimes for entertainment … but always for answers.  I was remembering this morning, something I read a while back (could be a month, could be 2 years ago – its what happens when you are about to turn 40).  I look at living life (how I live) not as a predetermined path of existence bouncing from one episode to the next, but as a multi-level directional path.  I believe everyone on earth has their own path (or life) to journey.

What I do with my life is up to me – I chose the path, the direction, the meaning.  I chose to live my life helping people become better, building people up when they need it, listening to people when they need to talk, guiding people when they ask for help.  This is my choice in what I want to leave behind.  I continue adding to my life, so I may give to others.  What got me thinking about this was what I read a while ago.  We all know there is “Dark” and “Light” … “Hot” and “Cold” … but what if someone were to tell you there is no such thing as “Dark” or “Cold” – what would you say?  What is the first feeling you felt inside your heart or mind when you read those words … think about the concept before reading further.

…

…

Welcome Back!  So – what did you feel, what was your reaction?

If you think about it … what is Dark?  Dark = Nothing.  So how can “nothing” be something?  Once something is dark … can we make it darker?  Can we add darkness to that?  We are surrounded by “darkness” or space – the vacuum our whole universe exists in.  So consider this, Dark = the absence of light!

Just like Cold … how do we make something cold?  We remove the heat.  In order to cool the air we have air conditioners that chug alog pumping freon from a gas, through the coils condensing it into a liquid which removes the heat from the air and the result is “cold air.”

But what if there is no such thing as Cold?  -459.67 degrees … Absolute Zero!  You cant get any colder than that – Scientists said so!  So, if Absolute Zero is as low as it goes, how can “Cold” be?  You cant make something colder that Absolute Zero – right?  Along the same lines of Dark … I will say Cold = the absence of heat!

So where am I going with this … LIFE … how do you live your life?  Your life starts at birth (or conception – but we are not discussing that today!) … when your life starts you begin learning.  Learn how to chose, learn how to adapt, learn how to BE who you are.  What you ADD to your life is the path and direction you take.  So, by thinking along this logic path … Is there such thing as BAD (Evil) or could we define “Bad” as an absence of Good?

Every person is born the same – as a baby, with ZERO knowledge of anything else.  We are taught by life, the environment, parents, friends, teachers, strangers, animals, everything!  From the first day – we begin learning.  When we say “That person is Evil” or “That person is Bad!” … I think that is a misstatement.  People who do Bad or Evil things are just lacking the “Good” in their life.

I want to challenge your way of thinking – instead of defining those around you as “Bad” … look to see the level of good they have.  I am going to bet … 99% of the time you will find they are just low in that category.  There is no Dark, its just the absence of light … there is no Cold, just the absence of hot … and there is no Evil, it is just the absence of Good!

If you live to do good, be good and show others how to be good … what would happen?

I Own The Word Parent!

// January 11th, 2010 // 2 Comments » // Belief, News

Since there are some people believe words can be owned … I am going to claim ownership of the word “Parent” and all iterations of the word (Parents, Parental, Parenting, etc).

Why am I claiming ownership of a word?  Because I’m seeing groups claim they own the word “Marriage” and it’s definition.  Their public statements baffle my mind.

According to these people, Marriage is strictly defined by the Bible as a union of man and woman.  We are living in a world where if a gay or lesbian couple try to get married – someone in an office gets an email alert and they run out to squash any and all usage of the word “marriage” and all iterations of it (married, marry, etc) pertaining to the relationship!  It is just ignorant.  In our country the right to freedom of speech is held dear and this behavior is a slap in the face to free speech.

Now that the religious nut nuts own the word “Marriage” do we need to pay royalty fees?  Do writers need to submit their compositions to the Marriage police to ensure they’ve used the word correctly?

According to Dictionary.com – “Marry” (aside from the Man/Woman definition) is also defined as:

to unite intimately … to combine, connect, or join so as to make more efficient, attractive, or profitable … to cause (food, liquor, etc.) to blend with other ingredients

Also the word “Marriage” (aside from the Man/Woman definition) includes definitions like:

any close or intimate association or union … a formal agreement between two companies or enterprises to combine operations, resources, etc., for mutual benefit; merger … a blending or matching of different elements or components

You may be wondering why I’m going on this little tirade.

I ran across a quote from Jenny Tyree (Marriage Analyst for Focus on the Family in Colorado), the quote was in an article about the health care bill and its effect on married couples – but her quote gave me enough motivation to look her up and read other articles she chimed in on.  My hunch was correct – she is ignorant across the board, not just on the government health care issue (I’ll be posting on that next!).

Regarding marriage, Jenny has been quoted saying:

“Maryland’s homosexual ‘marriage’ proponents betray their short-sighted view of marriage with their constant talk of it simply to obtain benefits and recognition,” she said. “They ignore the fact that the heart of marriage — our most pro-child institution — is to help ensure every child has a mom and a dad.”

Excuse me … but doesn’t biology ensure every child has a “Mom and Dad?”  Isn’t marriage about ensuring the children have a stable family and good parents?

I’m also confused about her statement saying homosexual proponents “betray their short-sighted view of marriage … ” Are you KIDDING me Jenny?  So let me get this straight … you and Focus on the Family would rather have a child raised by a Man/Woman combo no matter what?  Please tell me you and Focus on the Family are not THAT “short-sighted.”  Just because a man knocks up a woman and they have a baby does not make them “parents”  If it were up to me … I would put a child with a loving and caring couple – a couple who understands respect, love, compassion, empathy … a couple that will raise the kid to be a benefit to society!  According to your dogma, this is impossible if this is a gay or lesbian couple.  I do not need to go into all the “what if’s” … I know how you skirt those questions.

So – I now own Parent.  The word parent is defined without regard to biology.  Here are my rules for using the word Parent:

1. Parent is important, therefore it’s always capitalized.  Parents are deciding what our world will be like in 30 years — they deserve a capitalization.
2. The word Parent has no ties to biology.  Certainly the biological baby mama and baby daddy can be parents, they can also be losers.  Birthing a child and raising a child are totally different.  Men leave women to be single moms, spouses separate and share the parenting duties in individual households, people live as a family and treat each other horribly every day.  Biology does not make a Parent.
3. Parents are not focused on being their children’s best friend, they are focused on teaching them the foundation they need to be adults such as; boundaries, responsibilities, societal rules, work ethic, love and support

If marriage is about the family and raising children, then you need Parents to make it work.  I’m on a rampage to take back the word marriage, my first step is to claim Parent so they can’t use it in their narrow hate filled ignorant definition.  Using the Bible to preach hate …. somebody ought to be ashamed of themselves.  But that’s another topic for another day.

With that said … I hereby declare I own the word Parent!!!

Why Billosophy

// January 1st, 2010 // No Comments » // Belief

Billosophy started one fine night over a few glasses of wine in our local wine room / restaurant.  There were about 10 of us hanging out, drinking wine and chatting about life in general when one of my friends started talking about the Ohio serial killer Anthony Sowell and his unfathomable actions towards the humans he murdered.  I found myself thrust into a discussion over God and why he would allow someone like this to live and murder, but 5 year old Noah Biorkman was living his short life with stage IV neuroblastoma (sadly Noah passed away in early November and my thoughts are with his family this year).

My friend (I’ll call her Rachel) would continue asking why would God allow this … why would God do this to his humans.  Interestingly enough, one of the participants in this discussion was the preacher from the local church and before he could give his opinion I jumped in.  God did not “do” this to humans … It is the way humans treat each other.  I shared my thoughts with “Rachel” and the preacher for almost an hour.  Arguing that if God allowed one human to be good, and another to be bad … why is it not possible that each human (you and I) can use our own ability to think, and therefore decide and do whatever we want to do.  Critical thinking gives us humans the edge over all the other animals in the world … if there is a God (according to the Bible) he gave us the ability to think and by giving us that ability, God gave up the ability to control us.  So you cant blame God for the atrocities that humans inflict on each other, in my opinion.

“Billosophy” was the word I used that night when “Rachel” asked me why I didnt go into preaching.  She said “You missed your calling!” and I replied … “I am not quite sure how many people would follow Billosophy.”